While researching the reasons why my Baptist coworker isn't allowed to drink alcohol, I stumbled upon the concept of two wines in the Baptist faith: one being newly crushed, and thus unfermented, and one being the alcoholic kind we sell in stores today. I went back, trying to apply the concept of this unfermented wine to older stories. For the most part, it worked. But eventually, I came upon an impasse: the Wedding at Cana. The 'punchline', as it were, is that one typically serves the good wine first, so that once people are nice and buzzed (and thus their tastebuds are slightly less discerning) you give them the lesser wine, and they're less likely to notice. This concept doesn't fly with non-alcoholic wine, as it's the alcohol that allows for the lesser wine to be served second.
This would mean (as far as I can tell) that both Jesus and Mary were involved in alcoholic wine, if not to the point of full intoxication, then at least to a point beyond refreshment. And there were no moral warnings against intoxication here, so obviously this part didn't disturb them.
How can I stay in the Baptist mindset and make this grok? I'm having difficulty, and hoping you guys can help me.